So I've got this great idea for a screenplay. The story goes like this... Due to severe beatings she had received as a child, a thirty-something year old woman develops a strange phobia and doesn't leave the bathroom for two years. I know, bizarre, yes? It gets more interesting. The woman spends the majority of her time on the toilet. Yes, on the toilet. In fact, she spends SO much time on the toilet that... Continue Reading

Do you ever go to Google to search for your name? A search for David results in 719,000,000 web pages. Zoiks! A search for Brenda presents 31,500,000 results. And search for Fred will get you 120,000,000 results, including a stock chart for Fred's, Inc, whoever that is. Last year, I Googled my name to see where I came up in the results. Continue Reading

Did the overgrown rat in Philly see his shadow this year? It doesn't really matter as this winter has been incredibly mild. Six more weeks of sixty to seventy degree days, huh? Brrrrr.... bring it on. Continue Reading